The L Word : Behind the Scenes

The L Word Bette Porter Tina Kennard

Sleeping Rough – Bette Porter L Word


“Just a knife, nothing. Swords we don’t allow. Where are you from anyway?”


“Cute kid.”


My phone rings. It’s Alice. I decide to not ignore her nineteenth call. ”Alice.”

“Bette! Oh my God, where are you?” Alice lowers her voice conspiratorially, “They’re looking for you, you know.”

“I’m ready for them.” I lean against the car and open one of my WalMart sacks. I thread the scabbard along my belt and slide in my bitching red camo knife. “Crap. I forgot to rinse out the sippy cup in the store.” I blow inside it instead then fill it with apple juice for Angelica.

“Bette we’re checking out in an hour. Shane’s completely MIA, completely missing but Tina’s still here, Bette. And Man! Is she fucking mad!”

“So, am I, Alice,” I hiss.

“Well, other unexpected things happened after you left.” Alice takes a breath.

“Like what?”

“Well, Helena got booted off the jet, and Peggy flew away with the Preacher-lady. That no one saw coming.”

”I love Peggy Peabody.” I smile at the thought of our take down combo yesterday.

”So, she’s called you – Tina has – like a million times.”

“I know. I can’t figure out how to block her number.”

“Oh, that’s easy. You just…” Alice stops. “Bette,” she begins to whisper, “I’ve got to go. Just don’t do anything stupid. And come home.”

“I’m thinking about it.”

“Well, think about it while heading south.” Then the line goes dead.


Vancouver, BC – Tina

“Henry, quit hovering over me! Fuck! Just go out in the hallway, or go to the bar. Just give me some space.” I push Henry out into the hotel corridor and slam the door shut.

I have big problems that I didn’t have an inkling of yesterday.

I’m losing control of everything, and I didn’t sleep. He says he didn’t either, but he’s lying, I heard him snoring as I lay awake and wondered, and worried, and then I had cried.

Partly, out of frustration that I don’t know what to do with Bette, or Angelica, or Henry anymore. Everything about my life in the last two years feels ill conceived, and removed of my decisions, and yet – I made them all.

Author: Blackbird Writes

Fiction writer and filmmaker

10 thoughts on “Sleeping Rough – Bette Porter L Word

  1. Via LesFan slntrdr

    Submitted on 2014/04/26 at 10:04 am

    Haven’t commented on this fabulous series of stories, yet, but they are… fabulous. Wonderful therapy for what I think of as Post Traumatic S3-Disorder (PTS3D).


  2. Via LesFan azmama

    Submitted on 2014/04/26 at 2:36 am

    You are absolutely correct, Ms. BB. Bette is a lovable snob. Did she expect to find Manolos interspersed amongst the Crocs? Or perhaps, an Armani stashed by a made in Viet Nam suit? And Ms. Porter is truly a Cursing Goddess. There is a funny video on YouTube where Bette curses up a storm….lots of F Yous and Shits. JB does it with such panache. I love reading her narratives. Keep up the great work! It’s difficult to be funny in print but you do it so well.


  3. Via LesFan tomboydee

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 10:06 pm

    Bette has went “out of control” when she kidnapped her daughter from Tina. it was extreme expecially when she bought the knife from Walmart. Hilarious paragraph about Bette not know what “Walmart” is until she shopped there. it was very funny. the one thing i hate is, tina and bette argument from their attorney’s meeting. heartbreaking!!!. i really enjoy this story. you written so much good stories i had read in past few weeks. keep them coming cuz i look forward to them.. always!!!


  4. Via LesFan Bette0Porter

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 3:15 pm

    LOL Bette going nuts was hilarious, but sad at the same time. It’s wonderdul how you wrote her feelings (in a funny but not ‘too much’ way; it’s just real) I could really feel her wanting to injure Henry (… and I’d gladly help her). It’s true, sometimes bad things in life lead you to think about some of the craziest things ever… after all, he’s one of the many things that took the love of her life away from her.

    Thanks, again, for another amazing chapter! So looking forward to reading the next one.


  5. Via LesFan bumsue

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 1:40 pm

    Bette’s got her mojo back. You can’t keep a good woman down for long. Each of them drove the other to the edge of the precipice and it concluded with explosive reaction. But the underlying current still exists as they both admitted to it.
    The scene in Wal-Mart was priceless as Bette was dropped into a new world of possibilities. The knife was a good touch. Her snootiness of being a consumer was changed a bit with what was offered to her in her time of need.
    I love the way Joyce deals with them when they’re more into shouting then listening. She has a way of getting them back to what’s important when no one else can. Great chapter once again, Thank you for your unique insight into this world.


  6. Via LesFan cvu

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 9:36 am

    This is the part where everything in their life…”is kinda crazy”.. 😦

    But Bette in Wal-Mart is hilarious!


  7. Via LesFan brinny

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 2:54 am

    Excellent! You turned a terrible chapter in Bette’s life to the Alpha that we love so well full of courage and unswerving convictions. It was so funny…Bette wanting to skin Henry alive and great job of showing us the Bowie knife. I lost it when I read about the “wolf protector”! Care to share what Joyce’s report was about?


  8. Via LesFan azmama

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 2:27 am

    Bette is definitely and officially fucking nuts! Deranged! Wally World is her go to store? Very funny! You perfectly captured Bette’s Vancouver insanity. I loved the scene in Joyce’s office. Bette had her swerve on w/her clever and sharp toned comments to Tina. Desperate times call for desperate measures.


  9. Via LesFan lipitora

    Submitted on 2014/04/25 at 7:40 am

    It was totally crazy! 😀
    I leaned in laughter during the shopping trip. this would be an interesting twist in the story, see Henry skinned alive 😀 I bet, you can even write about this. but I’m not so cruel 😉
    I look forward to how they’re starting fix their relationship.
    I look forward to the next chapter


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