“Bette, you are so sick if you think I’m going to hit a woman. Back off and go have another drink with your rich friend, Peggy Peabody.” Henry snarls a bit, and then puts his happy-guy mask back in place.
“Tell you what. Two things in fact. First, don’t insult, Peggy. She’s wealthy, not nouveau riche. And two, don’t think of me as a woman right now, Henry, as if that makes me something other than a real threat to you at this moment.” I end in a feral sounding growl.
Peggy gives him a pitiful up and down assessment that comes back wanting. “Young man, where are you from anyway?”
“Oh! God! Are we going to bring up breeding now?” Tina cries at Peggy.
“Well dear, someone should. I mean really.” Peggy clucks at Tina and shakes her head woefully at Henry, her genetically inferior selection as a father.
God, I fucking love this woman despite what I may have ever said, or thought, or ever written in nasty emails in the past: She ripped the skin off both of them with that one!
“No, fucking seriously, Henry, I am going to fucking hit you. First with this.” I smack a wad of fax paper into his face. “You’re not the only fucking idiot who paid seven dollars a goddamn page for faxes from LA to Canada.”
Henry smirks at me and unfolds the pages to read. Tina leans in closer to him. Both such fucking idiots.
“Delightful!” Peggy peals, “Tina this is where as they say, “The Worm Turns.” Am I right, Bette?” Peggy puts on her reading glasses, “You have a spare copy, don’t you?”
“I do.” I hand her a half dozen folded pages. “Read the top of the second page where it says that Henry is actually still married to not his second, or even his third, but his fourth fucking wife.”
“Oh my, Tina can you really be that . . . desperate?” Peggy looks over her glasses, truly concerned.
Henry’s face falls.
“Now, I am going to hit you.” I cock my arm back, but Tina calls out.
“Wait! Let me!” And she slaps Henry a good stinging smack across his face.
“Bette, now it’s your turn to be my Second.” Peggy tugs at my arm that our work here is finished. “I’ve got to find Helena. You’ll want to see this, too.”
“It’ll be my pleasure.” I flame an unmistakably look back at Tina: You’re done, we’re done. I get it. It’s really, finally over between us. “You’ll get a text from me in an hour. I’m taking my daughter on another sleigh ride.”
The next story in the series, “Sleeping Rough” is an amusing rollicking tale where Bette kidnaps Angelica and ends up at a Wal Mart searching for baby supplies. http://wp.me/p4AUvc-2G
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